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this song

I've never seen you look like this without a reason
Another promise fallen through
Another season passes by you
I never took the smile away from anybody's face
And that's a desperate way to look
For someone who is still a child

And in a big country, dreams stay with you
Like a lover's voice fires the mountainside
Stay alive

I thought that pain and truth were things that really mattered
But you can't stay here with every single hope you had shattered
I'm not expecting to grow flowers in the desert
But I can live and breathe
And see the sun in wintertime

And in a big country, dreams stay with you
Like a lover's voice fires the mountainside
Stay alive

And in a big country, dreams stay with you
Like a lover's voice fires the mountainside
Stay alive

So take that look out of here it doesn't fit you
Because it's happened doesn't mean you've been discarded
Pull up your head off the floor - come up screaming
Cry out for everything you ever might have wanted
I thought that pain and truth were things that really mattered
But you can't stay here with every single hope you had shattered

I'm not expecting to grow flowers in the desert
But I can live and breathe
And see the sun in wintertime

And in a big country, dreams stay with you
Like a lover's voice fires the mountainside
Stay alive

And in a big country, dreams stay with you
Like a lover's voice fires the mountainside
Stay alive


(in a big country, lyrics)

10.14.2009
 
this is a nightmare
this is a silent song i have yet to speak to you about;
there are notes and lines cluttered together - yet it is the best way to describe how i am feeling this very moment.
i don't think you quite understand how this all affects me.
i don't think you quite understand yourself, eitther - but that's another conversation and another song.

i've seen many things, and i've done twice the same.
they are dirty and wrong, and i always wonder -
how many people actually know. have you told anyone? i haven't.
but sometimes when i realize how horrible you are - i want to.
this is a silent song because secrets have no words.
you run in fields of pathetic excuses and illusions you have drafted and created for yourself.
you are a sorry excuse for society.

i hold a lot more in my hand than you think.
i am a powerful person.

(in my opinion, i think you should shut up and do as i say) -
but your stuborness has led us to this - this dirty song, this dirty dance that we sway to. you do understand i will come out victorious?

just you wait. this song will end soon.
10.14.2009
 
if you keep thinking this way

i create things, you people; and i make them beautiful.
why pull the leaves from a growing flower - just
just to let it die? do you know what you're doing?

you were so honest once, and yet i wonder if -
deep down you always held this evil; this carelessness.
do your friends know what you do to those who have put so much out there for you - who have supported you?

you're letting me die with what you are doing.
the spark and magic are almost gone - and it's your fault.

this is not how things are meant to be.
when i know so much.
10.13.2009
 
the line that does not cross
Sympathy is a social affinity in which one person stands with another person, closely understanding his or her feelings.

i hate to be like this - when you've been so kind,
your innocent touches and kisses will never be forgotten.
but, this, this cannot stand.

i hate to be so honest (brutal),
but you've left a mark that can't go any deeper before blood is drawn and lives are lost.

i hate to be so rude (natural),
but this is the game you played and lost and there are no returns. there is no tomorrow when you're gone today.

cause i just don't give a damn.
10.05.2009
 
shepards pie and crowns
there are hearts you cannot break.
this sea is filled with more hope than you imagined.
you drown in sorrows and empathy, and you never expected -

you wear a kings' crown and sit on your thrown,
"i am the master of the world, so bow my peasents!"
and yet you sleep alone at night in layers of gold sheets -
there is more hope in those you have abandoned than
in the walls they built.

you sleep alone at night by single candlelight.
"i demand fresher fruits, and more beautiful women!"
you see diamonds and toss them away - you want better.
you hope something will fill this burning in your heart.
the king must have everything, after all.

you want to hear something new. this palace is dead,
as is your - heart, mind, bed.

"if a king whose fit for this throne cannot be pleased, let his people know it is their fault and they should burn in the flames of hell."

and yet, you still sleep alone in cold walls.
you are a king fit for none, yet above all.
you are a king.
10.01.2009
 
this is not part of your lifetime
evil is a bibically ruined word.

there are poets in the world who sat under trees and wrote -
wrote on pages of parchment until ink became their skin.
wrote out their hearts as if it was their voice.
there are poets in the world who wasted their life on -
that one line they never found.

yet, our generations, still read their lines and try to cut them -
decipher, and potray in animation - what we cannot grasp.
do they even know what they defined? what they created?
we are a foolish youth, and yet we think we egotistical minds.

when will we begin to think simplier, and forget -
that the only thing that will matter is who we are, rather than
(clothes, makeup, possessions, comments, friend count).

when will we grow up.
thirty and counting and the poets of yesteryear still have us beat out. give up now.
09.30.2009
 
little boy and my wolf

little boy and a wolf play in a garden;
of apples and treats to entice you -
but only hiding thorns and swear words.
you're always blinded by the shiny.

what do you know about life,
and who are you to judge what's right and wrong.
why do you cry, whine, yell - yet sleep so peacefully.
the world judges you less than you judge a single person.
what's that say about you?

you like sugar-coated things and tissues when you cry.
you like to know you're right. you read the world like a book;
yet you're part of your own fairytale.

little boy and wolf bring you in,
sweep you away by perfection.
you're thirteen and too precious for words.
you're sixteen and play the devil's sidekick.
you eat apples until he thorns dig at your gums.
why do you continue to be dragged in?

cry says the boy with the wolf.
you're a sinister bastard.
and your fairytale never turns out quite right.

at least you have your apples.
09.28.2009
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